"I just sit and watch the people there. And they remind me of wind up cars in motion.
The way they spin and turn and jockey for positions.
And I want to scream out that it all is nonsense.
All your lives one track, canapos;t you see itapos;s pointless?
But then, my knees give under me. My head feels weak and
suddenly it is clear to see that it is not them but me, who has lost my self-identity.
As I hide behind these books I read, while scribbling my poetry,
like art could save a wretch like me, with some ideal ideology that no one can hope to achieve.
And I am never real; it is just a sketch of me.
And everything I made is trite and cheap and a waste of paint, of tape, of time."
I sat here for hours staring at a blank page... Trying to leave you with more. Than hurtful words in succession at a blank canvas.
I tried for years. To doll you up. To make you prettier than you really are.
To reason with your dirt. Itapos;s like that dress you stopped wearing...
spilled red wine and suddenly its spent.
Suddenly itapos;s not good enough.
To wear.
To love.
But this attempt is a waste.
Because Iapos;ve hated you from the moment I started knowing you.
And you are all the things Iapos;ve said.
Youapos;re a selfish broken little girl. With her daddyapos;s money. And her daddyapos;s indifference.
With a penchant for needing attention and ignoring what you have.
You are the emptiest girl alive. And alone in every sense of the word. You donapos;t understand suffering.
Youapos;ve got pills to melt that away.
Youapos;ve worked for nothing. You have nothing to show for 23 years. And Iapos;ve been here all along.
Iapos;ve loved your lies, Iapos;ve believed in your truth.
Iapos;ve been abandoned too many times by someone who never once possessed me.
Iapos;ve laid in bed listening to you cry.
That daddy took away your credit card.
When blood was seeping was seeping from between my legs.
While I was losing my chance at creating something bigger than myself.
And in that moment I had nothing to cradle
���� �but you.
So sure. It would be ideal to make this pretty.
To mention we had a good run.
To say as you said, that I will always love you.
But I wonapos;t.
I will walk away
as Iapos;d intended to do for months now.
I will not wish you the best.
�
I will wish you the worst of all things,
because it is the worst of moments that forge real character.
It is the worst that often reveals the best.
It is everything terrible that makes you cling to the smallest moments of good.
Itapos;s those who suffer.
Those who hurt.
Those that feel.
Itapos;s those kids that deserve the best.
Goodbye.
(you cunt.)
"and I thought you were beautiful but I wept with each movement"
article life prison, acid etched, acid etchants mixed, acid etch weld test, acid etch staining of concrete pictures.
